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I have a few questions about genocide:

1. Is what the Germans did to the Jews during WWII genocide? (Note: it is frequently referred to as such.)
2. Is what the Europeans did to the native North Americans genocide? (Note: it is very rarely referred to as such.)
3. When is genocide justifiable?
4. Did the people who instigated and perpetuated these campaigns (which included murder, rape, enslavement and torture) know any better? In other words, can their deeds be understood and forgiven within the greater context and culture of the time, therefore lessening the impact and responsibility of what was done?
5. Is it only genocide if you are the victim? Is it something else if you are the aggressor?

I would appreciate it if you could answer these questions as best you can in order to discuss what genocide actually is, and what impact it has on the future.

Do you have wings? I like to think that I do. By the way, this is an old meme, but I don`t actually know what my readers`Myers-Briggs types are. I wonder if there are more I`s than E`s that read my words, and the details of those I`s and E`s. Why don`t you take a Myers-Briggs test and find out, then tell me here? I, of course, am an ENTP. I think.

I would also encourage you to read this. Just how emotionally mature are you? I would say that I am just to the right of the middle of the pack, although the last year has pushed me further to the right (assuming that emotionally mature is on the right side of the scale, and emotionally immature is on the left).

And my God, this is beautiful. I have never heard this story before.

When you are taught a history that does not include you, it could lead
to a feeling of alienation, as though you are not really a Canadian (or
American, or whatever). It's yet another way to feel marginalized, and
I do not think that this marginalization should be blamed on the people
that feel that way. That's simply part of the way that your world has
been framed. Although I strongly identify as Canadian (and Quebecois,
and as a Montrealer) I have never really felt as though I have a stake
in the history, and therefore historical fabric of this country.
English or French people grow up knowing that they are part of a
"good", "valuable", "normal" group that can freely judge other groups
while ignoring certain struggles. Everything begins and ends with them.
This is huge. For me, this hasn't been that much of an issue until
recently, and I can see why it might be for others all the time. I
think that my brother and sisters all reacted to this quite differently
even if they never concretely identified exactly what was going on
growing up. It's like knowing that something is just "off", but not
necessarily knowing what. Anyway, you're too busy trying to fit in, or
preventing your ass from being kicked or spit on.

There are some things I don't really talk about much, not because it's insignificant or too painful, but because it hasn't happened all that often; at least not overtly. But when I do think about these things, I just shake my head. I am referring to assumptions made about you by people based on the way you speak, or the name you are given. Please, PLEASE read this blog post by Daisy, if you haven't already. Daisy is a blonde-haired blue-eyed American woman with an African-American name. Some highlights:

And I only got my silly record and book reviews published when I started using a pseudonym. Were they suddenly more readable?

Or even better:

When I did customer service, I worked with mostly black women.
And we were supposed to give our names, like good customer service
robots: "Thank you for calling blabbity blabbity, I'm _____, how may I
help you?"

"WHAT did you say your name was?"

Here it comes.

I always repeated it, obediently. And I often heard lots of illuminating stuff after that. A few:

"Are you a n-gger?"

"Are you black? Give me someone white. I want someone who can find their ass with both hands, no offense."

"Oh, God no."

(to someone else in the room) "Oh guess what, guys? I've got ______ on the phone, and she's gonna -solve- our problem!!!!" (room responds with hoots, hollers, boos, laughter, etc.)

"Give
me someone white, and don't argue with me about it, just do it." (On
these calls, I very much enjoyed getting the black supervisor with the
British accent on the line; we both enjoyed putting one over on them.
But I always made sure to tell the supervisor what was up.)

In other cases, I dug my heels in. Fuck you, I thought.

In
short, on the phone, when assumed to be black, I reacted that way. When
asked point-black if I was black, I wouldn't tell. "Why?" I'd ask.

"Because
I need to get someone who KNOWS WHAT THEY ARE DOING," they'd reply,
screaming. They would wait a half-hour for a supervisor they believed
was white, before they'd let me deal with their situation, as I could
have done in 5 minutes or less.

They made all sorts of
assumptions when I wouldn't tell. "Most white people don't want to be
mistaken for black," said one woman authoritatively, "so I think you're
black, but you don't sound like it." Obviously, she thought this was a high compliment.

Have you ever thought about masculinity? The more I read about it, the weaker it actually seems to me. It makes me think of the Emperor's new clothes; strong, majestic and noble, yet when you look directly at it, ridiculous and with no substance.

The thing about men and masculinity (as opposed to women and masculinity; some women have it, but it doesn't define them), is that although independence is often thought of as being part of masculinity, the truth is that is depends on women and other men to have any meaning at all. It depends on how much you can control and subordinate others, particularly women and female stand-ins. This largely explains why men are so often the perpetrators of violence against women, "lesser" men and children (although women are very often the violent ones, make no mistake). This explains why so many men insist that they have the final word on important decisions, because otherwise, they wouldn't feel as though they had any value in the running of the home. So much happens because men feel as though they have or don't have enough masculinity. It so important, yet can be so easily taken away, whether it be by women or by societal institutions (think: black American men and systemic discrimination, a topic too large to really get into here.).

In short, men can't be men without women to make them feel like men.

It must seem so silly to some women that the notion of appearing to be or feel like a man is so important to some men that they will literally do anything to achieve that masculinity. And I mean, ANYTHING. Some will sexually assault women because they threatened their authority, also known as manhood. (I've always slightly bristled at the term "manhood" in reference to one's penis, as though it is the sum total of a man.). Some will engage in violence for the same reason. Defending one's manhood is a little like defending one's honour. When you read about the things some people will do for it, you shake your head and wonder how it could possibly be that important.

I suppose you could say that femininity depends on others as well. Some women will do anything to be a mother, for example, including kidnapping and murder. It does happen. But in general, it seems more innate and less fluid than masculinity. Of course, this could simply seem that way because of female gender theorists that too easily criticize masculinity, but have little to say on how fragile femininity might be. I would have to do more research on that.

What do you think of when you think of racism?

Is it the image of a Klansman burning a cross on the lawn of some innocent black family? Is it the bar owners in Longueuil that refuse service to black people? Is it perhaps your father promising to disown you if you bring home a (fill in the blank)?

Some of the above things still happen to this day, and the perpetrators are the people you know. It is still a reality for most PoC (people of colour) in North America and abroad. But there are many that absolutely insist that racism no longer happens, and if it does, that it's not such a big deal. And with any good virus or aggressive cancer, it changes the more it spreads. With the largely forgotten struggles of the civil rights movement came the awareness that burning crosses and lynching people aren't very nice things to do. And believe me, that is pretty much where the empathy ended for many people. Name calling and discrimination are
not nice. It still isn't really understood that it was far, FAR greater than that, but it is a huge accomplishment, especially when you look at history that goes back a few hundred or thousand years.

Here's an example. My sister is 15 years older than I am. Her experiences in Brockville were FAR different from mine. Where I was occasionally made fun of in Grade 1 for being different than others, and the usual jokes were made about my penis and so forth, she was openly shunned and literally spit on. People would laugh at the very idea of her being of equal status to them. She suffered physical and mental trauma that I did not. It's for this reason that she avoids going back there as much as possible. 15 years later, the younger brothers, sisters, nephews and nieces of her peers largely knew better than that. I was openly treated as an equal, or even as a superior at times because of my good grades. But there was often something more subtle that grated on me. Something that I could only start to express very recently. Something wrong.

With the American election race hoopla happening right now, many bloggers and writers and colour have weighed in on the various aspects of the concept of race and its implications on the lives of PoC. They have put into words and published the very feelings that I thought that I was crazy for even thinking. They are talking about New Racism, or what I like to call Next-Gen Racism.

And here I thought that studying rhetoric was a waste of time. I now admit my willful ignorance. Read this article about the link being the relative voicelessness of certain people compared to the sound of their voices. Quite eye-opening.

One of the most obvious criticisms of the Canadian health care system (and Quebec system, and it pains me that I have to separate the two) is that it can take months to get important appointments such as checkups, scans and surgeries. But since being diagnosed with cancer, I haven't had to wait at all for anything, really. For example, I spoke to Suj last April and got an appointment with a GI on May 3. It took about two weeks. On May 4, I spoke to my surgeon. On around May 14, I had a diagnostic laparoscopy. On June 7, I started chemotherapy. When I got an infected blood clot, I was almost immediately sent to a room in the hospital. My surgery was scheduled only three weeks in advance. Post-operative care has been within three weeks whenever I needed it, and often much sooner than that. This latest round, my appointment with the oncologist was within two weeks, and my chemo (which is tomorrow) was scheduled within a week of that. Easy.

People say that those who get treatment as good or better than mine are considered or assumed to be privileged, as in rich; they get what they need when they need it. Everyone else can go to hell, it seems. First of all, who is everyone else? Am I privileged because I am close to a major Canadian health centre? Is that it? I think that's partially the reason, certainly. Someone in Kuujjuaq probably wouldn't have the same care as someone here, certainly. But what else sets me apart? Am I privileged even for those within a short driving distance of a major Canadian health centre? Are there people in Scarborough or Pointe St-Charles that have to wait and wait for weeks and months for care, while I have to just call or walk into the hospital and get what I want, sometimes even before I want it? Maybe the staff just likes me, I don't know. I think I get along pretty well with nurses, actually.

Can anyone comment on these phenomena? Who is not getting served properly in Montreal, Toronto, Vancouver, etc.? I know that I had an advantage at the very beginning getting into the system, and perhaps that made ALL the difference. I was able to get referred into the system, possibly because I knew someone. I can't say for sure if that's true or not, but it may be true. I was examined by this specialist. But I don't think that that explains the treatment I have received since then.

Spoke with the oncologist today. They have decided to give me the FOLFIRI protocol, which is MUCH less brutal than the TCF protocol that I had before. Instead of spending the day in the hospital, I will spend 2 hours hooked up. Instead of a large fanny pack with 500 mL of 5FU over 5 days, I will have much less of it in a smaller non-mechanical delivery system (it's quite ingenious) over less than 2 days. I expect to be at work the whole time. One funny side effect is that men often lose their head hair, but not their facial hair. Maybe I sport a Shaft look. Or maybe I should not exacerbate the Mandingo stereotype, which is pretty much what Shaft does in my opinion.

I told the doctor and the nurse that since I am in much better mental and emotional condition that I could likely withstand a stronger protocol this time around. They decided to give me something moderate rather than extreme because I reacted so poorly last time around. I hope that they are not making a mistake by giving me something that is weak because I was such a baby last time. (Well, it WAS pretty fucking brutal. It was.) I don't see why we should prolong this any longer than it needs to be prolonged.

There is another patient about my age with the exact same situation. Same cancer, same surgery, same surgeon, same protocol. His mental space was apparently worse than mine. He is also saying that he doesn't think that he can continue with the chemotherapy. He's exactly where I was at the beginning of December, but there is a difference. He's had a very negative attitude throughout the whole ordeal. He also had some complications from surgery, but by and large, our experiences have been identical. I am told, though, that the difference between him and me is that my attitude has been, over all, much better than his, but specifically it's because he's never really lived on his own, nor was he raised to do this.

I find this interesting. Does this mean that those that left home earlier are generally better able to deal with adversity of pretty much any kind? I left home to go to university when I was 17 and have only lived at home during the summers between school years. Further, I instilled in myself the expectation that I would go to university and take care of my own affairs. Maybe I would be in the other guy's position now if things had been different. He's apparently more depressed and scared than I am. He's frightened, actually. I wish I could help him. There has been lots of talk about how coddled young people are. Maybe it's true. I mean, I suppose since everyone is going to university, they are living at home longer and longer, but what effect is this having?

On another, scarier front, it seems that my superpowers are quickly evaporating. Ugh...

I read Racialicious every day. This is an American site that discusses "America's obsession with race". I really enjoy the discussions about the mass perceptions about large groups of people. I enjoy the fact that someone doesn't actually believe that we are past racism, and that they are not sick of talking about it because it still affects them. To sum up why race discussions are still relevant, I'll quote Lauren Williams of Stereohyped:

I don’t want people to be blind to the fact that I’m black. I just don’t want to be treated unfairly because of it.

I read about all of this stuff but I wonder: I don't live the lives of these black posters. Sometimes I don't think I even compare to the blacks in Montreal, or Toronto if you want to go with an English-to-English comparison. My race is, on the surface, unimportant to those that know and work with me. Sure, there are regular instances of "otherness", which I have been meaning to write about for some time, but by and large, it seems quite different from these Americans. I should correspond with them more directly about them and why I don't always feel qualified to compare myself to them.

Related to this, I think about my own privilege in society. Apparently I wield immeasurable social power because I am a man, even if I am black. I was quite happy to find the following meme that I got from the blogger Tami. Let's see just how privileged I am.