I am rotting from the inside, but maybe I can reverse the process.
I don't want to die. I want to live. You have to die in order to bring forth life. Those who don't are regarded scornfully, as subhumans.
Conformity is the death of the soul, they say, and there are so many ways to conform that do not suit me. I conform enough already.
Last month I went to visit family that was visiting from SVG and Barbados. It was really quite an experience seeing all the similarities and glaring differences between all of them and myself.
It seems that those that come from small islands have typically small notions of success, at least by our standards, and St. Vincent is a pretty small island. For many of them, getting off the island and moving to neighbouring St. Lucia or any of the other nearby islands is a big achievement for them. It would be the equivalent of say, moving from Sydney, NS to Richmond, BC, especially when you have never been farther away then 10 km from home. Ever. If you can make the move from St. Vincent to St. Lucia, then you are doing really, really well regardless of the reality. And people will play up this myth to their social advantage.
It's why I have so many relatives that believe that we live like kings. If we have a telephone, we must be able to afford to have it, and for us it costs nothing to operate. For this reason, my cousin Agnes ran up a $1600 phone bill ten years ago when she came to visit. She spent a couple of hours a day on the phone to her boyfriend in St. Vincent. (And she was pregnant with his child then; I can't believe this kid is now about 10! More on this later.) You see, she didn't realize that long distance charges were much different than regular charges, and even if they are, we are all LOADED anyway, so it didn't matter. She never did understand why my sister in law, who had spent that much on phone bills over the previous ten years completely lost her mind. It may have been the first time I was ever completely on her side on something.
All right. I will jump on the bandwagon.
Have you ever...
01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink? No, too cheap.
02. Swam with wild dolphins? No, but I saw them playing in the wake from the ferry I was in.
03. Climbed a mountain? Does Mont-Royal count?
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive? Fuck, no. Fuck that noise.
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid? Nope.
06. Held a tarantula? Yes, actually.
07. Taken a candle-lit bath with someone? Yessir. Well, she wasn't actually IN the bath with me, but she was in the bathroom. It was Rose.
08. Said "I Love You" and meant it? Of course.
09. Hugged a tree? Not because I am some eco-hippie male dryad type, but just for kicks.
10. Bungee jumped? No, but I once did a horizontal bungee-type thing. It was fun.
11. Visited Paris? Nope.
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea? No, but I was IN the recent massive lightning storm that hit Montreal a couple of weeks ago.
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise? Of course.
14. Seen the Northern Lights? Nope.
15. Gone to a huge sports game? Absolutely.
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa? Nah.
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables? Yup.
18. Touched an iceberg? Nope.
19. Slept under the stars? Yes, if passing out drunk outside counts.
20. Changed a baby's diaper? Several. Bet you didn't guess that, did you?
