Last night I played volleyball. I used to play every Thursday night until May, when I decided that the level of play was too low for me. I'm not an Olympic player by any stretch, but it was no longer fun. However, Sylvie, my old boss, emailed me suggesting that I play last night because ex-coworkers were going to play as well. I agreed. I wanted to see what these guys were capable of.
There was little that had changed except for a few new faces. Among the new faces was a team of gay men. I have to say, up until last night, I had never played with or against an obviously gay athlete. I never thought about it; athletes just play the game. Females athletes play just like male athletes. In a sense, there is not gender, just the game. But these guys...It astonishes me how someone so flimsy, prissy and girly could play so well. It's not that they became "athletes" on the court and reverted to their queen/fag demeanour (what's the difference between a queen and a fag?) off the court. They played like extremely girly women. It's like they are proof that girliness and athleticism can mix. As long as you are not female, anyway.
Seriously, though, remember gym class back when it was co-ed? The girly-girls would be prissy, delicate and utterly incompetent at whatever they did. When they ran, their arms wouldn't be pumping, driving them along. Instead they would be sort of at their sides, or in front of them, only half-extended, as though they were fairy wings. They would catch a ball by holding their hands upwards to the air as though making an offering to the Lord, and hope that by some miracle the ball would magically fall into their hands or glove. Anyway, the gay volleyball team played like that with one major difference. They were good. Quite good.
It didn't make sense, but when they attacked the ball (spike) they would float up on their fairy wings oh-so-gently, and then SMACK THE BALL DOWN HARD. I mean, you just didn't see it coming. They weren't especially tall or strong. They just had a technique that was effective. When they were receiving a serve (heh), they stood there slightly bent over, but they still had the floppy fag-arm thing going on. But then, they'd make a great pass to the setter. It's bizarre just how good they were.
I've seen a ton of female athletes. They aren't what I would consider girly, really. I think of female soldiers, cops or firefighters the same way. I can't see them as particularly "girly". Those occupations and most competitive sports aren't particularly good conducive to that kind of girliness, except for Ultimate Frisbee, although that will likely change in the coming years, what with everyone saying how terrible competition is. Geez, defending competition makes me feel like a war-loving Republican, but that's another entry, I guess.
UPDATE: Gays and gay-supporting sources (not in the comments, at least not yet) tell me that I shouldn't use the term "fag" unless I am gay or close friends or at least acquaintances with lots of gays. I make a distinction between "gay male" and "fag". Will on Will & Grace is a gay male, his faggy friend on the show, the gay comic relief, is a fag. Or is he a queen? I still don't know the difference.
In any case, I will continue to use the term here as this is my space and I don't use the term in a hateful way; I know what I mean and that is good enough for me here. There is a difference between what a person says and means here and what a person says and means in meatspace. I really should get around to making that disclaimer soon.
Competition is good. It makes us develop. And want to better ourselves.
Floppy fag-arm thing or not.
I'm trying to figure out if that's offensive or not.
Meh.
Pretty offensive, I think.
If it is offensive because it isn't something I would say to someone with a floppy fag-arm in the flesh, then I suppose it is offensive. I'm surprised that gay groups haven't effectively taken ownership of that term. Maybe they have and I am out of touch.
Are you equating "girlie girls" with being non-competitive? They might be non-competitive in an athletic sense (i.e., while playing "games"), but this in no way makes them non-competitive in a general sense. Their apparent lack of competiveness is probably more a reflection of the fact that they don't put great importance on the outcome of sporting activities, therefore there is no need to compete. It's not just men - and men who play sports - who have a lock on competitiveness. I am far from being a girlie-girl, but I would also not consider myself particularly competitive (not in sports and not in life). I just don't think that you can draw a link between the two. But the Gay Volleyball players - I don't have an explanation for that.
If I had to make some kind of generalization, I would say that physically competitive women probably aren't very girly, but that girly women are as competitive as anyone else, but not physically. In particular, the girly ones that would enjoy playing a sport probably aren't very good at it, and their competitive streak probably wouldn't play out on the field, but in their relationships (romantic or otherwise). That's IF I had to make generalizations, which I am not always willing to do.
Men definitely do not have a lock on competitiveness. Women like to compete, too. On the field, like men. But both men and women are deciding that competitiveness (in school, on the field, almost anywhere) is a Bad Thing, and are trying to remove it from their lives, and their children's lives (like having no letter and number grades in high school, as an example).